A Cargo of Green Hearts
~POEMS~
you are enumerating all the things used to define yourself, all
the junk and sharpened spoons you carved out your little "I" with and then imagining each taken away one by one in the crow-hearted darkness when you are helpless and asleep strummed by the airwaves of dreams. to wake bearing one less suitcase, one less brick one less headdress of steel and weep maybe or search frustratedly behind the couch but each night the claws and silent robbery until the scaffold lies bare and you ask who built this? and why? but no one answers I did or because and the wind comes and goes through the tatters of your skin and at once you feel on par with the clouds who are no longer silent but throbbing with agency and intent, bidding you to rise and be like them, and if you hesitate before cutting the last string if your heart skips like a stone dancing sideways on a pond who will criticize you? hesitation is about balance, abundant when there is no weight left but the ohhh of the leap. the rain haunts me
it's like remembering days when nothing happened but a limb snapping in the backyard. we filled all the cupboards with silence and held hands. I wait, as if waiting by a bus stop.
the morning is quiet. some evening, you will come to me and the bus will have gone by. before I had any of these thoughts
I was as still as a doll or a star I orbited nothing but the silence and then I was alive and suddenly an old man it all happened so quick there was no time, not even for a summary. I think, though that I shall relinquish eyes less than any other thing, the way they tether or pull or push at the world with less than air and how they shut so that even the moon cannot reach them. as it happens when I am again a doll or star it is my eyes I wish to leave behind (most choose to leave their bones but I have promised them to the earth from which I was loaned such firmness) two jasper sparks, two silver buoys two candles in an empty house I haven't used them up yet. as it may be for a while let them keep looking out on what I loved and in looking become what they see and in becoming, light as light wholly disappear. sunset, the colors like
an explosion or should we profane it so with our warfare and cruel incindiary minds, knowing in memory deeper than wounds before gunpowder, flashburn such color and light suddenness would have been metaphored Revelation or Love or one hundred other powers our animal souls could feel our tongues no capacity to name, our fingers reduced to pointing up. the tiger with the cripple
foot is not the enemy. they say he wants to destroy the boy unwind the sticky string of his entrails across the jungle's dappled carpet then reel them back into his orange mouth. they say the boy will kill the tiger instead with some sharp ingenuity as if by killing a tiger a boy could still be a boy and all cruelty would cease. no. in my story there is no death and no edge the metaphors never concluding but if you followed them you'd find the boy and the tiger both moving deeper into the jungle where the trees thicken like the fingers of dreams and bells of consciousness drop their clappers. horizon's vice seems to press the two together: is that boy riding tiger? is that tiger wearing the face of boy? shall you follow and find out if it is true: the lies people tell about revenge and redemption and how they unravel the deeper into the interstices of the trees you wander until the dim stars themselves wink and laugh at you one by one before snuffing themselves on the matte of infinite space leaving you alone in the dark with the sound of the tiger's breathing and the relentless thump of your own mind? |
Poetry LogPoems are posted here when I'm ready to share them. I often don't title my poems. The date you see above the poem may be the date it was posted here and not necessarily the date it was created. To see more, click on the Archives below. Archives
January 2020
CategoriesUnless otherwise noted, all content ©Paul-William Gagnon, Creative Commons Attribution-Non Commercial-NoDerivs license.
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